"I Want to Be Great, or Nothing."

Fear, Fame, and Returning to the Page

There’s a line from Little Women that I’ve always remembered in the back of my mind. Maybe it’s because it hits that specific, breathless place in my chest that feels so close to home.

Amy says it. An ambitious, proud, complicated, Amy.

She declares, "I want to be great, or nothing."

Florence Pugh, Amy March in Little Women (2019) Image: Sony Pictures

I’ve always admired this sentiment because it was undeniably bold. Passionate. Fierce. It’s the kind of thing you might put on a poster in a college dorm, or say to yourself in a mirror before an audition for a play or really moving towards whatever dream you may be chasing.

But lately, I’ve realized: it’s not just a quote I like. It’s a quote I’ve lived by no matter how many times I watched Little Women in its many iterations, wondering what sister I was most like, first believing it had to be Jo since she was the writer. But maybe not. Maybe it was Amy, who I worried about and hated all at the same time throughout the story who was actually most like myself, much like I followed her words quietly, maybe even unconsciously.

And really, not always in the healthiest way.

“Talent isn't genius, and no amount of energy can make it so. I want to be great, or nothing.”

― Louisa May Alcott, Little Women

Because when I sit down to write— and more often, when I don’t— I feel, underneath the excuses and distractions and tasks I invent to delay the work from bread baking to searching for a new day job, is fear.